how old are your panties?

 I have recently realised that many of the pairs of undies in my rather full panties drawer have been around for several years.

Made me start to think.

Am I holding on to them for too long? Should I be binning them more often?

Or, do most people havbe at least some of their panties that are starting to fray, to lose shape, holes starting to appear in the lace?

How old are you panties?

Femme Enhance - Pills for Breast Enlargement, for Women and for Men (Product Review) Updated 11/09/2021

 I have been doing exercises to try and tone up my ass, give me a curved waist / hipline and to hopefully grown some boobs, get myself some gurly mtf tiddies!

I have also been looking at several supplements that are meant to help, and have been reading the product reviews and descriptions repeatedly for months now. So, last week I took the plunge, added a new one to my Amazon Wishlist (Qty 5+) and ordered a pack before I could change my mind. This is the Femme Enhance - Pills for Breast Enlargement. 

They arrived quickly, in fact on the first day of the delivery window advised when I ordered, in plain packaging that didn't give any hint / idea of what was inside - so as far as speed and discretion go - 10/10.

Having read the information on the product page, and then the slips in the pack, I took 4 measurements, as a starting guide - Hip, Waist, Bust (under boob area) and Cup (across nipples), and took my first pill. Obviously it's a bit early to expect any changes as I am only on day 2, but I will be taking measurements every week and will update / post new blogs as I go.

It is also worth noting, and only fair, that the instructions do say that some people (I am guessing more men that want to grow boobs from basically nothing) may need to take 2 a day (normal does is 1) and it may require 2 packs (60 days at 1/day or 30 at 2/day) to see noticeable changes.

Initial views, product and description match, well packaged and discrete packaging. Instructions are clear and the pills are easy to take, no adverse effects or anything to report so far.

Lets hope I get some tiddies to share and play with.

24/07/2021 - Update

Week One has ended, so time for an update.

I am going to start off with an excerpt from an email I sent to the vendor, as due to Amazon's rule that you can't leave a review unless £40+ has been spent on your account in the previous 12 months - not sure what the amount spent has to do with being able to give an honest review, but I am sure Amazon knows best!

Anyway, I sent them a link to my first post, and this is from their wonderful reply:

What prevents you from increasing your dosage to the higher level of 2 or sometimes even 3 pills per day is the possibility of premenstrual type symptoms.

Since phytoestrogens are similar to estrogens, it is entirely possible that when you take these pills you may feel at higher dosages PMT like effects - bloating slight headache etc.

If you do not experience these, then you can increase your dosage without problems and results happen even faster.

The thing to do is experiment. I am sure that you will succeed however.

So pleased that they replied.

Anyway, I have had no side effects that I have noticed, happily continuing to take the whole supply, and hopefully more after that too. I am so glad I have decided to try, and if needs be hopefully give me the confidence to go on and get hormone therapy, and grow a gurly body - shapely, curved, hairless n with boobs!

As to my measurements, nothing has changed so far, hips, waist bust n boobs the same, but it has only been 7 days.

Here's to another 7 days and another update 

30/07/2021

So, end of the 2nd week of taking these supplements. I have to say, still easy to do and no problems.

As to any changes, the important bit.

Visually, when I look down at my chest my little tiddies do look slightly bigger, a bit puffy and poking out a bit more, squidgy or squishy may be a better way if describing it. Not a huge change, certainly not a cup size change, but they look better and more pronounced to me, still too much hair on my chest though! And, my nipples are definitely more sensitive. Previously rubbing, touching, pinching etc had no effect. I didn't feel any sensation and they didn't harden. Whereas  now I do feel sensations n get excited and aroused when playing with them and they harden n poke out more - and I love it! 

My measurements (that yes I know I still need to share). Hips and waist no change, but a slight change in my chest (under tiddies) and across my tiddies for the cup size. Only about 0.1-0.2" but still a change, hopefully next week its the same or more!

06/08/2021

Apologies, I forgot to post an update on Friday, for the end of week 3. Still feel ok, no problems with the tablets at all. Looking at myself, I think I can see more definition in my little, well tiny, tiddies. They look to have a slightly more defined shape, a squishy roundness and definitely sensitive nipples! Oh my are they getting more fun. They get hard to the touch, and make me feel sooo good. I have even noticed myself getting a nipple on, pokies, from friction between my top n flesh, I am really, really enjoying that I can tell you. 

As to size, again slight changes in my under boob and cup measurements and this week in my hips too. Now, I am not getting excited, even though this is the second week I have seen changes in chest measurements, this could just be me not doing it in the same place/way so u am going to try to be more observant of this as I measuee from now on, maybe look in the mirror to try and match week on week. 

And, as a sign of my happiness at the possible changes, even though it may be me, I have ordered my 2nd box, so will be going into 1 2nd month and beyond, if some of my fans /followers feel nice maybe they could buy me some or donate and I will up the dose to 2 tablets a day and see if that speeds up the changes, I really hope so. The way I feel today, I would gladly and happily take estrogen hrt or a 'transformation' pill to get a curvier waist n hips and bigger boobs x

One question I do have, and tbh I haven't checked if they are meant to - not seen any changes in chest/nody hair yet x

13/08/2021

So, week 4 - My 2nd order has arrived already, so I have enough pills for another 30 days (at 1 per day), unless I increase the dose to see if my tiddies grow quicker.

Visually, they are puffy and look more defined, with nice sensitive nipples. I have found myself massaging (or fondling) my little tiddy bumps and it feels very good, before starting these pills I had never been one for playing with my nipples, or having them played with - I didn't mind but they just didn't react in anyway. I like it now! Hopefully it may help them grow too.

Measurement wise, just a small change in the hip / waist ratio, not enough to give me womanly curves but I can dream. Tiddies wise, again slight changes but I am happy and want to keep trying.

More next week!

20/08/2021 - week 5 update

I am not sure what I can say, other than that I am fine and my little tiddies are clearly more defined and puffy, very sensitive and soft to the touch - which made it difficult to measure, I need to pracive NOT squishing my tiddies to try and get a true guide as to size and growth. 

No side effects, just me feeling good and hoping that my boobs grow!

27/08/2021

Another week has gone by, and if I am being honest I would say that my tiddies look puffier and rounder, more defined and easily show as little tiddies, and I am proud of them. I also feel gurlier in myself, whether that is just wishful dreaming who knows, but I am happy with it.

As to measurements, hips and waist are the same, but there are slight changed to my bust n cup size. Across my very sensitive puffy nipples I appear to have grown, only by about 0.2" but it looks like growth, and I am sooo happy. Obviously I am going to keep taking the pills, and am now seriously considering taking 2 per day to see if I get a faster reaction n change to them x x 

04/09/2021

Gonna start this week's update with the usual feelings, looks etc and then add a 2nd bit.

So, my tiny little tiddies are soft, puffy and appear rounder, and the sensitivity of my nipples has increased again, god it's so wonderful hehe.

I have started to massage (well play) with my tiddies at least once everyday, i Know - such hardship hehe. 

As to measurements, my hip/waist ratio seems to be improving, only small changes but if it continues it will give me a wider hip and curvier waist profile, and what gurly doesn't want that!

Tiddies, it may just be the way i am measuring but again looks like a small increase in both my bust (under boob) and cup (across my nipples) measurements. So all good.

But, as I only have 1 strip of 10 pills left, I went to order some more, only to find that they are no longer available. I looked in a couple of places but couldn't find the same ones (unless I wanted to pay £50 for 30 tablets that is from a 3rd party seller not the original so no guarantee they are actually the same).

I will keep looking, but so I don't run out and maybe lose any hormone balance changes that I may have achieved, I have also ordered another brand - So once I start them I will start a new blog - only fair on them both. But, if i can get more of these going forward, I will.

06/09/2021 - Update

I haven't been able to get any more of these tablets, and they are still showing as no confirmed date of restock/availability.

So, I have looked around and ordered another type, made in the UK with good reviews, and a great price /offer.

As to my Femme Enhance, I have enough left to double up this week, so 2 tablets per day, and end them on Friday- day of my next measurement and tiddie check.

I will then start the new ones from Saturday, and a new review/blog update post.

11/09/2021 - Update

So today i took my last Femme Enhance Pill, I have looked on Amazon and a few other sites, but still none available unless I want to pay way to much (£30-£50 for 30 tablets).

Anyway, looking in the mirror and down at my chest, I am convinced my little tiddies are more defined, rounder and plumper than before i started these tablets, and without any doubt my nipples are more sensitive than ever.

Measured myself, small changes but the right kind, and still no side effects.

I will post a table of my measurements for you all to see, and comment on if you desire too

Lena x

New store idea's - Etsy?

 I have been looking for some time, to find a new hosting site for my store, or just to sell my adult items on.

It has been suggested that I create an Etsy store page, and post my worn panties, hold ups (thigh highs), tights (nylons), picture & vide DVD and to allow special requests to be made.

I have to admit I have never used Etsy, as a seller or buyer - so am looking for help and feedback. Is it a good site? Is it easy to post / sell and buy items on, without to many restrictions or stupid charges / fee's?

Any help gratefully received, or maybe you have a better option- Wish? 

I have a site, but it won't actually allow you to take payment - how stupid is that!

I have started the migration of my items to my @ManyVids page store, cum n see!

How biased and discrimanatory is social media

 No matter how much the social media platforms keep saying they are equal, support all genders, sexual preference and religions etc etc, fully behind LGBTQ / LGBTQ+, in practice its not.

I promised myself I wouldn't rant about the blatant preference and discrimination towards some gender types / sexual identifications.

Last week I tried to post 2 photos to my Instagram Account, and within seconds it was removed as it 'breached the guidlines on nudity and sexual content'.

Before i share the photo, bear i mind I have panties on, they are not sheer or seethrough in anyway, they are not so tight they clearly define and outline my boiclitty cock, which is not hard and obviously a cock. I do not promote any sexual activity, promotion or anything but myself.

I requested a review, which took several hours, and surprise surprise it was still removed for the Nudity and sexual content. I have appealed, but don't expect to get it even looked at (Instagram / Facebook say they get too many appeals to look at the all so just select a few to look at - totally fair system) as I am not a famous person or influencer with many thousands of followers. I am just me, trying to share and hopefully help others that are starting or on the journey of crossdressing, recognising that they are trans or coming out.

Going through my feed yesterday the following images popped up, they have been viewed by thousands, and have substantially more followers than me, but I am sure this has no bearing at all.

I am sure you can see, clearly see, why I am annoyed - very clear sexual content, very clear sexual organs in an aroused state and clear genitals, but both of these photos are OK - and this is a fair system?

Pardon my language, and tbh i am past caring if IG ban me again, but this is total bollocks. 

14/09/2021

Yet again Instagram, and Facebook, have shown their bias.

I logged into my IG account (www.instagram.com/lena_cdxd_bup) earlier today, and cleared my notifications,  messages and scrolled through my feed liking pictures etc, no trouble. Tried to log in again this afternoon to find that my account has been disabled, suspended and I can 'maybe' request a review in 24hours. No emails, no messages in fact no idea whatsoever as to what I have done wrong this time. Or is it just another gay persons account? There are photos of women posted all day every day that are far more revealing and sexual, barely hiding anything - tight/see through bra or bikini top, bikini or panties pulled into a tight camel toe.... leaning forwards showing full cleavage ... and more, all OK. But a gurly cd showing some bulge in her panties is to sexual and not allowed, really wtf!

Censorship at its best, in what is meant to be a country with freedom of speech and expression

 So, if you haveclicked on my IG link in any previous blog posts, tweets or any other format you will no doubt have noticed that it has been suspended, closed by the Instagram / Facebook police due to 'nude, suggestive or selling of sexual activities posts'

What did I do, I posted a picture in my underwear, it wasn't sheer, it wasn't to small to hide anything, it just showed my gurly bulge!

According to the reviewers it was pornographic content.

As many of you will have noticed, there are regularly thousands of pictures posted everyday on IG that barely cover a women's nipples let alone her entire boobs, or panties that are so small, so tight that a camel toes doesn't describe it, you can see the lips and often the clitoris poking into the material, nude shots of them sitting back to the camera or side on with arm across the boobs.

Yes these are ok, and don't get me started on the celeb pics - so what is different?

I am a gurly crossdresser, a gay guy in panties.... not a professional account, just me. 

I am infuriated that even when you appeal, they only select 'random' cases to review - how is it a fair and open system if they chose which appeals to even look at?

Don't get me wrong, I am all for protecting the youth, protecting innocent people and in fact everyone from exploitation and abuse. But that should surely mean that the protection applies to all, that everyone is treated equally and to the same standards, that is all I ask for, all i want, all i would hope for and expect.

Anyway, this rant was caused by seeing this picture on IG, been there this 2019, and by far not the worst

And yet, this pic of me was removed as to sexually graphic, not reinstated at review and appeal not actioned! And got my account banned.

Constant removal or posts from social media sites, yet others are allowed

 I said a few days ago on my IG and Twitter that I was going to post on here, to have a rant about the unfair, and seemingly targeted, removal of posts / blocking of posts on Instagram.

Yes, I get that they have updated their Terms of Use and Social responsibility policies, but it is getting stupid, and seems to be unfairly applied according to the gender / sexual group you associate with.

As you will know, I am a gay gurly crossdresser. As such I love lingerie, dressing in womens clothes, sex toys and cock - lots of toys n cock.

I recently posted a picture of my ass, and it was instantly blocked and removed as breaching the guidlines - it didn't even get posted for anyone to have reported it, so it is the IG censorship.

Yes, I can see why it 'could' appear as if I am naked, but is it offensive? Is it showing any of my shaved bits or butthole? No.

And, I am not naked, I am wearing a pair of red C String Panties, you just can't see them in this picture. And, if I had shown the panties I am certain it would have been removed anyway, as a lace c string doesn't hide much...... what do you think?

Yes, as a very gurly, very gay crossdresser I may be biased, but I have had several posts removed in the same way, I have asked for a review - no change and not ONE of them has been selected to be looked at on appeal (the way their system works is that a random selection of appeals are selected for review, not all, so it is pot luck if your appeal happens to be selected). 

And what makes me mad, makes me risk being banned by IG (again) is that there are many, many posts by women that are far more sexual, far more revealing and yet don't breach any regulations around content.

Below are a couple that I have taken screenshot's of from my feed, there are lots more to chose from, and please, please tell me if you think I am wrong - that certain groups are targeted and treated unfairly and with unequal controls and requirements.

Rant over, for now

Lena

 

                                        

what is so difficult to understand!!!

I quite happily admit that I am a gurly crossdresser, a cock loving bottom. I am an anal slut, cock loving, fuck my ass n mouth, cum swallowing whore at times. I am prone to taking very large things in my ass, stretching & pushing my limits, wanting to train my mind n butthole to accept more n more, deeper and wider. On top of this I like to take pictures and video clips as well as do live cam shows, so a bit of an exhibitionist (outdoor's fun is fine with me too). 

But nowhere, not on my Twitter, my Instagram, my Onlyfans, my website or here on my blog... no where does it say I am  sissy or a slave, 9n fact it says I am NOT one. So why, oh why, do I keep getting messages from ppl wanting me as their siaay slave - is reading beyond their basic abilities, or just unable to comprehend that a gurly CD cock slut isn't the same as a sissy / sissy slave.

Lockdown.. are we heading in the right direction?

We have all been in lockdown this year, no matter where you are in the world skme restrictions have been in place due to Covid-19. The severity and length of the specific restrictions may vary, but we have all been impacted. And, as we are heading out the other side into what is now the normal (can we call it the new normal anynore or is it just normal?) way of life, countries or individual areas, are all doing it differently. 

Yes, countries are at different stages of the pandemic, but would a more standardised set of controls and ways of living been better for the world? We are seeing the impact of this now, in the air and tourism industries. Differnt nations can fly, or not, to different destinations and theb have different requirements when you return home. This is causing confusion and in fact may be increasing the spread and probability of a 2nd wave, which may be even worse than the 1st.

So, my question is - what do we do now to work better together as a human race, not just communities or nations?

Anyway, serious rant over lol

do you like you meat hot n steamy?

With the weather in the UK so warm at the moment, and as I write this I am sitting in a pair of thong panties, and I am sweating like crazy.

But, it has also made me soo dam horny, especially after being a good gurly & had a pee sitting down.

This if course meant pulling my panties down to my knees, and oh boy - the hot sweaty, slight hint of pee, smell that wafted up as my shaved uncut boiclitty cock n balls were released + the hot smell of the panties themselves, made me sooo horny I had to stroke my boiclitty. Which led to me moaning, not just with the joy of maturation but also the added amazing smell as i pulled my foreskin back. God I am a cock hungry slut!

I just love the smell of cock, even better when it is from a guy n not my limp gurly little boiclitty, hot manly sweat n cock mmm mmmm

I don't mean a dirty, stinking, not been washed in days cock smell, just the fresh sweaty kind hehe

Is that just me, or do you like it too?

Such a thrill, going out to Adult Store dressed fem n gurly

If you have read my previous blog, on the latest and wonderful addition to my anal toy collection, you will know that last Thursday, 05th December 2019, i visited my favorite Adult Sex Shop - Vibez Adult Boutique store, originally intending just to buy some delay / numbing spray for my butthole. But, more importantly I had shared on my twitter feed the night before that i wanted to go dressed fem n gurly, with pics of options that i was considering - heeled ankle boots (that make a magnificent sound as you walk in them), female low rise hipster jeans, some sexy lace panties (of course) and a choice of grey or peach / pastel orange top, with / without bra n whether to also have my DD fake boobies in as well.

So the evening of the 5th arrived, and on the way home from work i stopped at a relatively discrete place - in the entrance gate to a field but it was clearly visible from the adjacent M20, even more so as there was a street light opposite where i stopped. Here i stripped out of a boring suit n tie, slipped on the hipster jeans and ankle boots and i went for the grey t shirt, a bit less fem but more see through, but no bra or boobies (which i soon regretted!). So dressed i got out of the car to wiggle my ass in the jeans and get them nice n low, after all why wear lace panties of not to show them off, and put man clothes in the back of the car. I then headed off towards Aylesford and Vibez - btw it feels so good driving in these boots with their heel, not ready to drive in stiletto heels yet.

Upon arriving at Vibez, i did have a few nerves as there were several cars in the spaces and didn't want to be ridiculed, slipping a fleece on as comfort blanket. Anyway, i headed in, heels clicking loudly on the concrete outside then store floor. And it felt fantastic.

As i entered i was immediately greeted by the son of the owners, who are always so welcoming and put you at ease. We chatted for a while, and as we did so i could hear a man/women couple browsing behind me and they could clearly see my boots and panties, if not knowing the jeans were female ones. I was loving it! After probably 5 mins chatting i started to browse, looking around and seeing some wonderful toys (one of which ended up in my hands later to buy n ride as soon as i could).

So, as i wandered around i got more n more confident and could feel my jeans riding low n panties high as i bent to look at products and walked around, admiring the toy selection, bondage gear and the  the dress up out fits, dresses and lingerie - oh my they have some yummy bra / pantie sets, panties, corsets n dresses with a new range coming 2020 too. I was feeling so good, the fleece came off and i proudly walked round as a gurly(ish) customer - getting told that next time i should come as fem as i wanted, boobs, wigs, skirt or whatever i wanted to wear!

I headed back to the 1st toys i had viewed, picked up the Destructor buttplug and some delay spray, heading to the till and paid as chatted about xmas n stuff.

As i left i put my purchases in the car and had to take some photos, as proof, and to share - here they are.

I felt so exhilarated, such a rush and release and so relaxed, confident and happy. smiling as i drove home, still dressed female x x